Highs and Lows of Dust Assassination.

I am a dust assassin, for hire.

At least that is what I call myself to make my job description slightly more...edgy.
...I am more commonly known as a 'cleaner.'
I do 3 houses, one tanning salon, and a law office and I make good money doing it.

Believe it or not, I am not just cleaning other peoples dust and grime for the money it brings out. I actually LIKE cleaning. I love to look at a good mess and make it go away; classic before and after. Honestly, my favorite part is that I work solo. I am fully capable working of working for or with people but... I would just rather not. I like to be in control and if I am the only one, I get that privilege. We'll leave it at that and move on.

But dust assassinating isn't all fun and games (actually, there is no fun and no games but, you get what I am sayin'). Sometimes it is an epic battle for cleanliness. Sometimes the dust fights back. More often the tools for fighting the dust fight back; namely, my arch nemesis the vacuum cleaner.

Yesterday there was one such previously mentioned battle. I was cleaning a nice house, out on a lake (a summer home, but some pastors were coming to stay in it so the family wanted it cleaned out) and it had come time to vacuum the hardwood floors with their central vacuum cleaning system.
So I popped the attachment for floors on and flicked the switch which SHOULD have trigger suctioning.

No such luck.

I look into the metal pipe-like thing which connects to the hose; there appears to be a mass of somethin' blocking it.

I go to pull the pipe-like thing off, but it is kind of difficult, so I pull too hard and yank the metal piece back into my face. Minor blood loss followed, and I now have a half inch long cut under my left eye. Dust assassinating isn't for the faint of heart.

Now I am holding a paper towel on my eye and looking under sink cabinets for a pipe snake or something long and snake-esk to clear out the thing so I can vacuum the darned floor.

No such luck again. People must not keep pipe snakes in their summer homes...

I put my Macgyver thinking cap on and look around for something I can substitute. In the laundry room there is a wire coat hanger. Good enough.

I straighten that baby out and start jabbing it down that clogged vacuum pipe. Whoa, the thing has like an inner blockade of unidentified substance.

After more prodding and stabbing out pops a wad of... black hair.

I kid you not, it was like a golf ball of...hair. As if someone had brought a gorilla out to the lake house, given him a good shave, and then vacuumed it up. I was a little surprised but glad that I was at least winning.

I look down the pipe again. Still clogged. I continue with my jabbing and eventually I have about 6 wads of...gorilla hair...on the floor before me.

I still have NO IDEA how in the off season of the summer home (And I cleaned it in December last for some Scottish missionaries, and I did not vacuum any primates), this had managed to occur. Somethings just cannot be explained...

But at the end of the day, I won. I beat that vacuum. And the gorilla fur. And the evil forces of dusty darkness...

Dust assassination might not be easy, but it sure is an adventure. And if you can get out with your eyes intact and only a little blood shed, it makes for a pretty satisfactory job.

In case you ever wondered...

Hair foils.

They always kind of baffled me, but now that I have had some stuck to my hair, I finally have them figured out.
In case you, like me, have ever wondered how exactly they stay there, and what the point of them is in the first place, here is a video to help you.

*one of many videos in the course of our friendship filmed on her tennis court. Others involving movie quoting, Monty Python galloping, Rave Dancing, trampolines, spontaneous singing, and whoknowswhatelse.



One of the many upsides of my cosmetology school- going best friend (who is at a cosmetology convention in NYC as we speak) is that I get a good deal of secondhand information on hair. A lot of it goes right over my head, but I enjoy listening to her share her growing expertise, and I try to retain as much of it as I can.
I now understand foils. And highlighting. I am very intrigued by weaves (the act of sewing more hair onto ones existing hair!). Actually, I mostly just like to SAY "weave"...
And I could talk about afros with her all day long(*naghh*).

Although, no matter how many times she explains perms to me, I may never come to a complete (or even slight) understanding of how they work. I am pretty convinced there are magical forces outside of her control involved and I'm not sure how I feel about that...

Haircoloring in the Great Outdoors.

My best friend Emily Michael is amazing.

She is even more amazing than you might imagine her to be because she is a hairstylist to be (she is 300 hours into cosmetology school).

Today was 55 degrees and to usher in the beautiful springyness we decided to...

...color my hair.

She has previously put maroon/dark red streaks in my hair with "hair paint," but up until today my hair was techincally "virgin" (oh yes, they DO call it that in the professional world.) as it had never had any REAL color treatment in it...

'Tis no longer (prime example of how easily friends can influence you :p).

We, in our flip flip flops and other springy attire, went over to our local hair product store and bought some dye and whatnot. Back at her house we decided that coloring hair indoors on such a fabulous day would have been silly.

So we went and highlighted my hair out on her tennis court.

After much mixing, spritzing, foiling, and other professional type things (as well as a snack of nachos and queso during the processing time) I ended up with highlighted hair.

Goldy/red.

We were going for dark blonde highlights, but because I have natural red undertones to my hair, that isn't what we got.

And I am actually glad. Because red things make me happy. And red things WITH Emily are even better.

Tennis court, smelly stuff, and hands of an artist.

The artist herself, with giant, offical school logo-ed apron and purple glazed hair.

Mixing.

Hair dye. Or mustchup (mustard/ketchup. Long story.). Looked like it, but suuuureee didn't smell like it.

Me and my virgin hair, pre-dyeing.

Test patch foiling.


Magical PURPLE foils. *Not good when windy(rarely in is a beauty salon...). Or at least not easy.

My best attempt at an armshot of my hair post-dyeing.

Em, you are amazing, in case you haven't realized

First ever award...

Chelsea Rebecca at Triumphs and Blunders of a Kooky Gal (who was going wild spreading bloggin' love around Bloglandria yesterday) presented me with my first ever Blog AWARD...

THE SUNSHINE AWARD!

Not entirely sure what that means- apparently, I brighten her day-but THANKS CHELSEA!!!!!

Speaking of sunshine, it is 50+ degrees outside and I'm breaking in my new sandals and have put on my favorite, faithful pair of jeans with the knees gone missin'.

HAPPY DAY! Spring is coming! 12 more days, my friends!

"Others have excuses, I have my reasons why..."

... and here is one of 'em.

Yesterday after working (cleaning a tanning salon about a half hour from my house) for 6 hours I took my nasty, dusty, sweaty self out shopping. I have previously made known my love of thrifting, and more particularly my love of the store Savers. This town happened to have a Savers that was BIGGER and BETTER and NEWER than "my" Savers, so I went to check it out.

Oh my gracious, happy, happy, gloriously joyful day.

After making my way through the rest of the store, I found myself in the dress section (strangely I am getting better at girly stuff. It has taken me 18+ years, but I am finally working up to the point of being able to handle dresses. But only on rare occasions, so don't get too excited...). A vibrant blue caught my eye. I liked the color. I like the pockets. And it was so short *in my opinion it is a long shirt* that I wouldn't ever imagine wearing it without pants *YESS!!!* under it.

I look at the price tag.

$7.49. Nice. Cool, and cheap. I love it.


Then the original tag, still attached, caught my eye. "I wonder how much of a deal I am actually getting."



Well, let me tell you, it was a big one. Like a $1282.51 dollar deal.


Yes. You read that correctly. The original tag read $1,290.
Not twelve dollars and ninety cents.I kid you not; ONE THOUSAND, TWO HUNDRED AND NINETY.



Whatttttt...????? Who on earth pays that for a dress (only like 3/4 of a dress!) ? And WHYYYYY??? I could pay for almost a whole missions trip (this year is $1900 for Costa Rica) with that money!!!!
I googled the tag and couldn't find the brand. But...tags don't lie. Usually. So unless it was a freak misprint and the decimal point went missing, I am going with what it says. It says $1290. I just like to type it out. Shocks me every time.

So, if you disapproved of my love of Savers before, maybe I've changed your mind. Maybe not.
Whuteva. I have a pricey blue dress and I got it for way less than the person who bought it in the first place. That certainly made my day!

Now I just have to wear the thing...



*title taken from Nickel Creek's song "Reasons Why"

I love...

...SHARPIE MARKERS.

I love 'em a lot a lot.

Quote-ables.

If you haven't been paying attention, the country of Chile was struck by a massive earthquake on Saturday. One of the largest in history; 8.8 on the Richter. That is 500 times more powerful than the one that hit Haiti a couple weeks ago. Then 50 after shocks followed.

Thankful the devastation has been much less, and the deaths have been far fewer (Chile is a wealthier nation with stricter building codes, so much more stayed standing. The same area also experience the largest quake ever in 1960.).

This earthquake hit me hard emotionally, more so than the one that happened a few weeks ago in Haiti. Though I was hearing stories and seeing the images, Haiti seemed like a far off land to me.

But I have been to Chile. I have stood in places that have now been hit with the destruction of this quake. I have friends there.

Back in 2005, I went on my first ever missions trip. We went to Temuco, Chile. There we worked with an indigenous people, the Mapuche, who the government has rejected. They live with almost nothing. But they are truly the most beautiful people, so filled with joy and generosity, that I have ever met. We helped them build a church, and since then other teams have gone back to help them set up micro-businesses through the building of greenhouses.

Please pray for my friends the Mapuche.

We (my church) also have close friends in Concepcion. There, a man named Samuel pastors a church. Many missions teams from our church have gone down and worked with his. His son Eliezar did an internship at our church a few summers back. We have sent part time missionaries down to Pastor Samuel and they have stayed in his home.

Last night, during Merge *our youth group*, one of our Pastors announced that we had finally been able to make contact with him; he and his family are okay. And I am sure he, his wife and children, are actively helping to aid people around them (at the heart of where the earthquake struck).

Pray for the people in Concepcion and for Pastor Samuel's family and church.

And now, the quote;

"God is our refuge and our strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling...
...Be still, and know that I am God."
-Psalm 46:1-3/10, ESV



Please join me as I continue to pray for the nation of Chile.